The dirty girl manifesto

I don’t think anyone could pay me any amount of money to relive my teen years. Not because they were so terrible, but mostly because I was so lost searching for my identity. Who was I? What were my beliefs? What did I stand for? It was all so confusing trying to navigate this sense of discomfort that I so badly wanted to part ways with. Truth be told, that discomfort still lives with me today, it looms over me like a dark cloud waiting to burst, as if my sense of self will be resolved through a spell of rain. I’m always searching for that epiphany, the moment I can truly say, okay, I know who I am now. Despite still feeling more confused than I was at 15, I’m grateful my angsty emotional self found herself on YouTube watching this video titled ‘Dirty Girls’. I don’t know what I expected, but judging from how much I listened to Nirvana and Hole, I knew it would be around themes of rebellion because that’s all my algorithm knew.

Watching this documentary unleashed a full-blown sense of visibility. I felt like I was gazing into a mirror of what I could be if I had the guts to stand up to the patriarchy. I wouldn’t have said I was a feminist then and I don’t think I would call myself one now but I will tell you that I believe in women. I think that women all over the world have the right to be treated fairly and seeing how poorly these girls were treated for going against the grain brought me so much anger. The anger stemmed from growing up in a predominantly white small town. The values shared in this town were small: small dreams, small expectations, and small concepts. I felt alienated all the time because nothing about me had ever been small. I’m black and carry a bundle of trauma from being reminded of the fact- so for me, it’s not about just being a woman, it’s about my entire identity and what the world thinks I represent. Which is why I can’t truly be the feminist most feminists preach to be. The media focuses on the women refusing to shave or the women advocating for equal pay, but who is advocating for young child brides? Are these feminists talking about honour killings? Do they even know about Honour killings ?? Probably not, because the majority of feminism is rooted in being a white woman.

The ‘Dirty Girls’ carried a sense of security in their beliefs, it was so endearing to me that despite the footage being from 1996 the themes discussed were still very much present in 2016. I had to show my friends! So the next day in school I said ‘Omg guys look at this video I watched yesterday’. We were supposed to be in a lesson preparing for exams that would change the course of our lives, yet we were hiding away in an unused classroom to listen to music and be silly… like I said we were angsty, we had no concept of seriousness but wanted so badly to have revolutionary concepts. I felt so cool following the ‘free the nipple’ trend even when I didn’t know why I was freeing them… I felt included when it came to body positivity. I had previously felt that if I didn’t have a thigh gap I would’ve been exiled because everyone was wearing Triangl bikinis that were paired with stick-thin legs. I was just jumping onto movements to feel closer to women and to feel closer to finding my sense of self. So imagine my surprise when I stumble on a video titled ‘Dirty Girls’.. you’re telling me I don’t have to fit the standard? I don’t have to be a typical girl from a typical town. How revolutionary! Instinctively I always knew I wasn’t cut out for that anyway.

‘Dirty Girls’ is an expose on a group of young 13-year-old girls who had been ostracised at their high school because of their determination to embody Riot Girl culture. Riot girl is a term coined from the punk scene that describes a girl who personifies punk values. Technically, the term riot girl was pioneered by the band Bikini Kill, but since the term was later used to label women within the punk scene, information about where the term hails from is lost in translation. The movement was created by feminists who felt their small voices needed to be heard as the noise from the heavily dominated space was too overbearing. It began in Olympia, Washington, before spreading across at least 26 countries. Riot girls created zines to be distributed throughout the community, which discussed topics around rape, racism, patriarchy,classim, and female empowerment.

Riot girls were filled with anger and resentment towards their male counterparts who they shared spaces with. Prominent female figures within the subculture of punk contributed massively to the movement, with the likes of Bratmobile, Heavens To Betsy, Hole, and many more. Being a riot girl meant that you spoke for every woman, not just the women you identify with. The values punk claimed to be built on were flawed the minute men in those spaces felt they could inflict misogyny toward women in attendance. The punk ethos tends to be an attribute people love to focus on, yet no one seems to focus on the fact women at concerts were being groped, belittled and facing atrocities. Someone had to speak for the women, and Riot girls did this. The documentary captured the pure spirit of rebellion in the most unrefined way. What made it so groundbreaking was that it truly encapsulated the authenticity of its subjects in a way that wasn’t invasive yet extremely personal. The young girls used the opportunity to speak on issues affecting women, which gave insight into why they felt so much resentment towards society. Dirty Girls was ahead of its time purely because the subjects were ahead of their time. They created space for powerful commentary on social exclusion, as well as showcasing that bravery isn’t always going to fight for your country, sometimes bravery is persevering regardless of your circumstances. If you wanted a time capsule to examine how life was back in the 90s, all you need is this documentary.

We talk about how Gen-Z is selfish in the sense that we will never sign up for things that don’t seem worthwhile. Millennials mock us because they feel that we are too ‘woke’ but truly, the generation that birthed Riot Girls walked so that we could run and I feel once you get older you become resigned to the fact you can’t single-handedly change the world. The reason we feel that Lady Gaga was ahead of her time is because artists weren’t willing to put their careers on the line to advocate for minorities but she was. Recently she was asked at the Venice Film Festival about a statement she had made about wanting to change the world, she responded ‘I must’ve been in my 20s when I said that’ which proves my point that it takes the youth to truly make the changes. The youth has the stamina and inherent disdain for the world to be able to go up against society and demand to be heard. Dirty Girls isn’t just a ‘documentary’ on feminist values, it’s also a snapshot of what the youth is capable of. Because they were brave enough to talk on topics that were considered taboo I can now sit here and freely write about this.

Isolation and rejection from your peers is the reward for understanding without your voice no one will speak for you. The young women were branded with the name ‘Dirty Girl’ simply because they realised that dressing up every day for the patriarchy went against everything they believed in but this isn’t to say that being a girl who ‘chooses’ to do this is shallow or pandering to the gaze it simply means that’s her choice. The dirty girls made a choice to present how they chose because they grasped very early on that your appearance doesn’t change how the world treats you when you’re a woman. Whether you are modest or outwardly expressive with your appearance the system upholding the world does not care about women. If all it takes is going against the grain to be labelled uncouth then what about the women that do everything right? No one is safe from the scrutiny not when you’re a woman.

This expose was groundbreaking for me then because I found their points about being a woman made complete sense. It’s so easy for someone to spout feminist values, but as stated before, many people’s statements centre on women who look like them; they never account for women who may outwardly present as different or appear different.

My whole point in writing this was to give flowers to the women who raised me whilst also holding space for nuance and understanding that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I have many female role models who have impacted the way I show up in the world massively. Directors like Sofia Coppola, who have platformed female stories time and time again; models like Ashley Graham and Alex Consani, who have created groundbreaking shifts within the industry for plus-sized/ trans women; women like Shonda Rhymes who have proven to me that being black doesn’t stop you from contributing to good tv. I have so many role models, but I also have so much grace and understanding that to create change is to build a community. Building a community or catering to a community will always force people to listen. To be a Dirty Girl is to defend those in need. Defend the girl getting slutshamed by your male friends, defend the girl who has been labelled as crazy. Defend what could so easily be you because that is the bottom line. The Dirty Girls went through being ostracised so that things would be easier for the girls who came after them.